If you have younger siblings, or your parents are the type that hoards pieces of evidence from family bonding, you've probably seen a drawing by a little kid. I'd bet five (5) Canadian dollars that it was shit.

We've identified a problem. Now we need to know why it happens.

Is it the lack of fine motor control? Is it that they don't have enough practice? Or maybe they just think that people actually look like blobs and triangles. Lets get into it.

By four (4) to five (5) years old, the standard for fine motor control includes cutting along a straight line, and write a couple of things. In the three (3) year timespan to seven (7) to eight (8), they should be able to write full, comprehensible, short stories. Of course, large expectations on children this young will stress them out, especially if the adult makes it seem like they're 'behind' other kids. The only true way to measure a small child's intelligence is to leave them alone at the nearest NASA headquarters and wait for the news reports. However these ideal growth patterns have to have some reliability. If a little kid should be able to reach a standard, it is probable that most of their peers have also reached that standard, meaning that it is likely that most seven (7) to eight (8) year-olds can make the tiny shapes and lines of letters in a way that is recognizable to the average English speaker. The details required for a good drawing are just as, if not less, complicated than the English alphabet.

The complicated thing is shading. Little kids have less experince being alive and seeing things in 3D, so maybe the thing they have trouble with is depth perception and shadows. After research, I found that when born, infants don't really see in 3D, but by the time four (4) or five (5) months passes, most can tell how far away small objects are. This suggests that they have fully developed depth perception after a few years of life on this dreary planet. So, if they can see shadows, why can't they draw them? The first several years of life are full of repeating things around yourself. Infants hear and repeat curse words, toddlers want to dress like their favorite princesses and a large chunk of motivation for the potty-training process is that you want to go like your parents. It's not that kids don't use art as another way to recreate what they see around them, because the most common thing you see in the awful drawings made by them is their family. The only thing that they can't quite capture is any sense of realism or beauty.

Now, drawing, like any hobby, is a skill that requires practice. The biggest piece of advice for aspiring artists is to draw everyday. Little kids have had less days to practice, because they haven't been alive as long as us older mortals. However, if you were to enroll a child in preschool at a young age, where the staff will encourage drawing and other tasks to strengthen their skills, that kid will have had plenty of practice by age five (5) or (6) when they enter the public school system. Just about three (3) to four (4) years of practice. Except, three (3) years is plenty of time for someone to become a master. Vincent van Gogh was painting masterpieces that displayed a strong comprehension of shadows and depth in LESS than three (3) years of practice, and he didn't start until he was twenty-seven (27). Obviously, if Vincent van Gogh could do it, it is perfectly reasonable for you to expect this of a child. Mental crisis included.

So, its not the fine motor control, its not the eyeballs and its not the lack of practice? What could it be?

I have a theory.

We know that children are more than capable of producing beautiful works of art, but they don't. There is only one possible reason for this.

It's a political statement.

Think about it! Little kids have little filter, often stating what they think with no regard for anyone else. This is their tactic of gaining the public's trust. Their cute little faces? Giggly laughs? All of it is a part of a detailed Public Relationships policy. Those bratty kids who throw temper tantrums every time they don't get something they want and convince teenagers to never have kids of their own? They are the real heroes of America.

We don't know the goals of this rising political party. We don't know their numbers. We don't know their budget.

If there is anything that this country knows, its that the unknown is dangerous.

Protect humanity. Practice abstinence.